What a whirlwind 2019 has been. It’s only September, and a lot can happen in the next 3 months, but I would say as a whole this year has been nothing short of endless lesson learning. All in good ways, of course.
If you’re at the stage in your life where I am right now, you’ll understand the next few things I am about to say. It has seemed the past 3 years have been the most eye-opening years of my life. And that is pretty cliché to say when I’m about to be only 27. But doesn’t the saying always go, you learn a lot in your twenties? 2017 was a year of poor choices, negative energy, and a whole lot of selfishness in all the wrong ways . 2018 was the year of realizing all those mistakes and pondering how I was going to deal with all of those experiences shaping my future. Was I going to grow from them or stay stagnant?
Then this year happened. 2019 has been the year of using those experiences to become a better, stronger, more confident person in all areas of my life: as a wife, as a friend, as a daughter, and of course, a fur mama. It is the year I realized I wanted to be better for me.
It is crazy what becomes clear so quickly when your entire mindset changes from a negative one to a positive one. You start to realize who you are, what you want your life to look like, and who you want in it. With that said, a lot of lesson learning happened this year. There are still a lot that can happen in next few months, but here are the 4 things I learned to let go of this year, to have a better next year.
1. Relationships That No Longer Serve You
And I don’t mean that literally. Figuratively speaking, we all know the relationships we have in our lives that exhaust us more than make us happy. Maybe you have that one friend who reaches out when convenient for them, but then you’ll go months without hearing from them. Or let’s say there’s someone in your life always putting you down, rather than lifting you up. It’s not always a friend, maybe it’s a sibling. Maybe it’s some things you have on your social media. Remove those relationships.
What do I mean when I say remove? I mean take a step back. Don’t give that relationship with your friend all your energy. Don’t be the one always going out of your way for the other. Unfollow those accounts on social media that make you feel bad about yourself. Communicate less with the friend who isn’t very nice to you. You don’t need to necessarily cut them or it out of your life entirely. However, I noticed when I took my own step back and gave less time to those negative things…my mood shifted. The way I viewed every day evolved. I started to notice a lot more things that I enjoyed, only restoring positive energy back into my time.
2. The “I Can’t…”
We’re all victim of it. At least once a day, I bet you find yourself saying “I can’t _____.” I swear my favorite phrase used to be “I can’t do that.” I’d respond to a dinner invitation that way. Anxiety can be a real pain sometimes. I’d respond with the ‘I can’t’ to attempting to get up at an earlier hour, or my favorite….”I can’t lose weight.” Anything that starts with those two words are like poison. Invisible poison to whatever positive concept the idea truly could have been.
The second I stopped using those words to start responding to ideas, a lot changed. I now tell myself the exact opposite…I CAN get up early in the morning. I may not want to, but I definitely can. I CAN make that dinner reservation, it’ll be more fun than my anxiety leads me on to believe. I may not want to put in the effort to lose the weight, but I certainly CAN do it if I want to. So much more can be accomplished as an individual when you leave the negative vibes behind you.
Remove the physical clutter. Let go of all the things that are clouding your space, physically and mentally. As someone who suffers from anxiety, I can attest to clutter making anxiety ten times worse almost instantly. Sometimes you’ll be having a perfectly okay day, and walk into a room that’s cluttered and unorganized…instant anxiety for no reason.
If the space of your home, room, or anywhere that you enjoy being is overflowing with items that you do not need or don’t even use, it’s time to let go of it. In fact, in my previous post talking about things that changed my life for the better, I mention how decluttering my entire house changed a lot for me. Remove the clutter so that going into next year, you have a clear space for your new mindset.
4. Believing You Won’t Be Successful
I used to do this. As a matter of fact that was basically my entire thought process for 2018. Reminiscing on all the things I could’ve done differently in 2017, for quite some time I truly believed I just wouldn’t be successful. What I realized the problem was, is that I was letting my emotion of uncertainty basically define and jump to the conclusion that because I don’t have it all figured out, there’s no way I can be successful. I now know I had it all wrong.
Let go of ANY and EVERY belief that you won’t be able to follow your dreams or do what you love every day. It’s a load of crap. As humans, we have thousands of emotions that we feel, but none of them mean we can’t obtain what our hearts desire. Our emotions don’t need to define our future actions. Success is a relative term in my opinion. Success for me looks like waking up every morning, excited about the day ahead, earning a living doing what I love to do (writing and sharing) and just being happy. That is what success looks like to me. But to someone else it could be wealth. Wealth could mean success.
Regardless of what success looks like to you, remove any idea that you won’t achieve it. Because you will. Work for it, every day. You’ll be amazed at what you accomplish when you start to believe in yourself.
I could truly go on a much longer list of things I learned this year to just let go of for a better tomorrow. But these 4 things stuck out to me the most. I would love to hear from you.
What are some things you wish you could’ve told yourself 3, 4…maybe 5 years ago?
Can’t wait to hear from you!